Revisiting A Hole In My Heart

One of the reasons I love the fact that I’ve kept this blog going for over 4 years now is that I can go back and read things I wrote before and see how my thoughts/perspective have changed.

A very recent example: I re-watched the movie A Hole In My Heart — which I still consider to be the most graphic, violent, sexual, and disturbing film I’ve ever watched. Although after I first saw it I never would’ve expected that I’d watch it again, there was something about the movie that has stuck with me all of these years. Now that I feel like I’m dealing with some of my own personal darkness, perhaps I wanted to see an example of utter darkness on film? I’m not sure.

Anyway, when I watched the movie during SIFF in 2005, I found the film to be an exploration of taboos and highly sexual behavior. Now I see the film as an examination of broken people who all seemed to have traumatic things happen to them at a young age.

I still find the film very challenging and I’m still not sure it approaches either of the meanings in a clear and meaningful way (I also found the film much more exploitative this time)… but I do find it interesting that I saw it in a such a different way this time. (And I realize that this isn’t a new idea at all — the idea that the way you see films [or anything really] changes depending on time was expressed very well in a scene in 12 Monkeys [or at least that’s when I was first really exposed/grasped the idea]).

…On a more upbeat note, while watching the film this time I managed to find the name of the crazy poppy song that plays early in the film. Turns out that it’s “Floorfiller” by the A*Teens.

Living Underground

It seems that if we want to move to live on other planets, the surface is probably the worst place to live. On the surface you have to deal with weather, atmosphere (or lack of), possibly solar radiation, dangerous dust (which inspired me to write this), etc.

If we’re going to plan on building colonies on the moon, Mars, etc. why not just plan to build the colonies underground? I know a lot of people probably hate the idea of living in caves, but it just seems to me to be the best way to go about things.

I know this isn’t some new revolutionary idea, but I guess for my sake now, when I try to envision living somewhere in space, I’ll picture something underground rather than some fancy tent or glass dome on the surface.

AppHole

I’ve been meaning to do a post about iPhone apps ever since I got it (… which was back in September 2008 or so…). But recently my friend Jolie and my sister both got iPhones so that’s a bit of a recent incentive.

I sort of plan on updating this as I find new apps and get recommendations. So please recommend other apps for me to add to this list!

The secret about the iPhone that you don’t really realize until you have one is that it’s almost more of a mini-computer and less of a phone. I honestly don’t talk on the phone much (though I do text message all the time), but I’m constantly using my iPhone for non-phone functions — and I’d say 90% of those non-phone functions are due to apps.

Must-Have Apps

  • Facebook — This one is pretty obvious. You can update your status from anywhere, see what your friends are up to, etc.
  • Remote — Control your iTunes library from your phone! I’ve used this during parties and when I have people over and stashed my laptop somewhere but still want to control the music.
  • Wikiamo — The best Wikipedia interface. I probably use this app more than anything else on my phone. If I’m sitting on the couch watching the TV and want to look up something about an actor or show to whatever, I use Wikiamo to do a quick lookup.
  • Shazam — Recognizes songs you hear at a restaurant, on TV, on the radio, etc. Since I’m always on the lookout for new music anywhere, this app is essential and it’s a great way to impress people. Personal highlights for me: Identifying “White Horse” by Sarah McLeod (a song that my ex-bf and I always used to hear on c89.5 [not that we really liked it, but we frequently heard it], “Feel Alive” by the Benassi Bros [another c89.5 song that samples “Layla” by Eric Clapton], “Major Tom” by Shiny Toy Guns from that Lincoln MKZ ad, “Wizball” by Beatphreak from an episode of Entourage)
  • Yelp — I mainly use this app as a phonebook that stores my bookmarked places so I don’t have to store tons of delivery places in my normal phonebook. It’s also good to get a quick review, of course.
  • Tweetie — I’ve tried both Twitterific and Tweetie (Tweetie is 99 cents) and much prefer Tweetie. While I don’t update my Twitter as much as I want to, Tweetie makes it easier for when I am feeling inspired.
  • Flixster — The best movie times app. It lets me bookmark my favorite theatres and then quickly see what is playing where. And like any good movie times internet app, it makes sure to put the matinee showings in ( ) so I can save some money.
  • Skype — Free calls if you are on a WiFi network. You need a Skype account (which is like $30/year). Unfortunately this app has been working like shit for me for the past couple months, but when it first came out it was great. I work at home a lot and this app could ideally save me tons of minutes for when I do conference calls and whatnot.
  • Amazon.com — Because I’m obsessed with Amazon. I don’t do the one-click checkout shopping too often. Mostly I use the app to look things up and then add them to my wishlist for later.
  • Zenbe — This is my favorite “list” app/web site. You can enter things on the site http://lists.zenbe.com/ and it synchs to your phone. This was really useful when my friend Katrina came to visit and we had a list of stuff we wanted to do and before she came up she could add things via the web site then when she got here they’d already be on my phone.
  • NPR Mobile — If you want to listen to tons of NPR stuff. I haven’t used this app much, but the design and concept is really cool.
  • myWireless — tracks your AT&T Wireless account. It shows your used/remaining minutes, which is very helpful.
  • i.TV — The only program I’ve found that synchs up with my TiVo so I can tell it to record shows when I’m not home. It’s got tons of other features so it’s kind of bloated.
  • Chase — Since Washington Mutual turned into Chase I now have an app to check in with my bank. And it does find nearby ATMs, which is cool.
  • Shopper — It costs 99 cents and is supposedly a great shopping list app. I still can’t tear myself away from post-it notes for shopping lists, though. Someday I hope to finally use this app.

Seattle Apps

  • SeattleBus — Yea, this app costs like $5 or $10 but for me it’s been totally worth it! While this isn’t the be-all-end-all bus app (you can’t, for example, say “get me from A to B”), it does show when buses are going to arrive at a particular bus stop. I use this at work so I don’t have to wait too long at the bus stop. It also shows when buses are running late, which is nice.
  • Seattle Metro — Another bus app. I don’t like this one as much, though. But I want to support both and sometimes use this one as a backup when SeattleBus isn’t working.
  • Seattle Cocktail Compass — Shows happy hours near you and how much time you have to get to them before happy hour ends. Unfortunately I don’t do happy hours too often, but the concept is cool and if nothing else you can use it to find bars.

Games

  • Sol Free — The solitaire app I like. For some reason I still love playing soliatire. I’d be open to a new/better version, but haven’t found one yet. This app also includes some other versions of soliatire (Demon, Baker’s Game, etc. — I always play Klondike Deal 3)
  • Scramble — Boggle — my ex’s favorite game so I sort of got into it, too.
  • Tangram Pro — I used to love these when i was younger so imagine my excitement when I found an app for it. A great “brain exercise”-type game. I think there is a free version, too, with less puzzles.

Cool Stuff To Show Off With

  • Seadragon — One of the only Microsoft-written apps. Seadragon is meant for touchscreen and this app shows how cool it is/what potential there is for when more PCs are touch-screen.
  • Lightsaber — How cool is it to have a lightsaber?!?! It totally sounds like the Star Wars lightsabers when you move your phone around.
  • Urbanspoon — This is that famous app from the commercials where you shake your phone and it shows you a random restaurant. I’ve never found it useful (it always seems to show restaurants that I for sure don’t want to go to), but still neat to play around with. If you use it for real, be prepared to veto its choices often.
  • TonePad — A Tenori-On for your iPhone!!! Recently popularized (to me, at least) by the amazing video of Little Boots playing with her “new toy.”
  • Zillow — Connects in with the Zillow site to see how much nearby houses/condos/etc. cost.
  • Kitsuné — Hooks you into my favorite French record label: Kitsuné Music. I haven’t found much use for this since I don’t use iTunes to buy music… but still cool.

Some other iPhone tips and tricks:

  1. I text message way more than use the phone, so I put the Messages app in the “bottom four” so I can easily access it. I never use Safari, either, so I might move Wikiamo down there, too.
  2. To make my own ring tones I use the export as an AAC then rename to m4r method.
  3. If you use the iPhone headphones, you can click once on the speaker to pause a song, double-click to skip to the next song, and triple-click to go back to the beginning of a track.
  4. When synching my iPhone with my computer, I have it set up so that I select which playlists I want to copy over to the iPhone. I have one playlist called “iPhone” that has my favorite albums so I’ll always have them if I need them.

Beat It

Michael Jackson in Beat It
The other week in my post about Michael Jackson I made a terrible mistake! When I listed my three favorite Michael Jackson songs (“Thriller,” “Off The Wall,” and “Wanna Be Startin’ Something”) I left off my true favorite Michael Jackson song: “Beat It.”

I’m not sure why I omitted it. I think I was caught up in the side comments (best remix, best cover, best sample of) and “Beat It” is so great on so many levels that it escaped my mind. I did mention that I had a recurring dream that took place in the garage where the fight scene happens in the video and I did mention that Moby and Boys Noize remixed/remade the song, but it didn’t get the proper listing as my #1 favorite Michael Jackson song.

So there you have it. I’ve set the record straight. And I really do encourage you to checkout the unofficial Boys Noize remix/remake as well as the Moby remix (which, I believe, first appeared on the soundtrack to Zoolander.

Proof of ‘The Sexual Politics Of Meat’

Whats Your Cut?
Last month’s Details magazine had a an article called “The Greatest Virginity Story Ever Told.” The story is about a 21-year-old guy with down syndrome who is a virgin and goes to Las Vegas to get laid.

What struck me, of course, was this guy’s tendancy to objectfy women by comparing them to food. Some choice quotes:

“I like their boobs,” he continues. “Yeah. Lovely nipples. Perfect breasts. They’re like chicken breasts.”

“You’ve got a tendency to compare things to food, haven’t you, Otto?” Bill says.

“Yeah,” Otto says. “Burgers with boobs. Stick in an olive—it’s like a nipple. And they have legs like bacon. And their bottom is like a steak. And they also have eyes like round biscuits. Actually, their whole body’s like a biscuit. I’m hungry for a stripper.”

I think next to the image to the right, this is the second best piece of proof to support the theory outlined in the book The Sexual Politics of Meat: A Feminist-Vegetarian Critical Theory — one of my favorite feminist and veg*n-related books.

Did You Ever Really Care?

I’ve recently been dealing with a fairly difficult (for me, at least) breakup. As part of the cathartic process I’ve been working on what I’ve referred to as my “bitter breakup mix.” It’s finally finished and I must say that both the experience of making it and the final product have made me feel a bit better.

The mix includes songs that express (either lyrically [from differing points of view], musically, tempo-wise, etc.) the various ways I’ve felt reflecting on the relationship and the break-up. The range of emotions cover sadness, loneliness, confusion, insanity, longing, reflection, apathy, alienation, etc.

The title of the mix, “Did You Ever Really Care?,” comes from the Annie song called “Anthonio.” While I don’t think my ex didn’t not “ever really care,” (double negative there: what I mean is I know he cared) it’s the way I’ve been feeling lately.

So whether you are finding yourself recently out of a relationship, or feeling restless in your current one, or remember what it was like to go through a breakup, or just want a cool new mix (it’s a pretty decent workout mix, too!)… here you go!

00:00 – Dallas Theme Song
00:09 – Frankmusik – Three Little Words (Blackstrobe remix)
02:50 – The Faint – Mirror Error (Das Glow remix)
06:56 – Röyksopp – The Girl and the Robot (Ocelot remix)
11:26 – The Biz – Love Is Gonna Save Us (Felix da Housecat remix)
13:55 – Deadmau5 – Sometimes Things Get, Whatever
18:33 – Marina & The Diamonds – I Am Not A Robot (The Shoes remix)
21:09 – Kissogram – My Friend Is A Seahorse (Radio Slave remix)
24:44 – Kissogram – My Friend Is A Seahorse
29:07 – The Knife – Heartbeats (Style of Eye remix)
32:11 – Ladytron – Destroy Everything You Touch (Sasha Invol2ver remix)
37:15 – Supercharge – I Think I’m Gonna Fall (In Love)
41:02 – The Juan MacLean – One Day
42:33 – Depeche Mode – Precious (Michael Mayer Balearic remix)
47:17 – Martin Solevig – I Want You (Tepr remix)
50:24 – Annie – Anthonio (Designer Drugs remix)
54:09 – Milke – Love Get Out Of My Way (Designer Drugs remix)
58:50 – Curses! – What I Need
62:24 – The Four Seasons – Beggin’ (Pilooski edit)
67:31 – The Supremes – Where Did Our Love Go?
69:01 – Christina Aguilera – Hurt (Chris Cox Club Anthem)

[save]  Download “Did You Ever Really Care?” by Who Shot JR?

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson in the Thriller video
Due to the nature of my job, it’s usually a few days after a huge event until I start to really reflect on it. This weekend I (along with probably a lot of other people on the planet) I’ve been thinking about Michael Jackson.

My mom reminded me that as a kid I really loved the “Thriller” video. I’m sure I loved it for roughly 50% music and 50% the awesomeness of the video. The song basically defined my Halloweens throughout childhood. There was something so dark and haunting about the video — yet it was a huge pop song.

My other childhood memory inspired by Michael Jackson was the video for “Beat It.” The setting for that video somehow inspired a reoccurring dream that haunted me throughout childhood. I’m not sure of the significance, but it’s definitely one of my top Michael Jackson memories.

Music-wise, I can’t deny that while I was never a huge fan of his music, I know a lot of the musicians I love were greatly inspired. From Justin Timberlake to Surkin to Don Diablo, not to mention all of the DJs I love who have remixed/sampled/used his work: Moby’s remix of “Beat It,” Boys Noize’s remix of “Beat It,” etc. etc. etc.

So where do I stand on my favorite Michael Jackson songs?

  1. “Thriller” (best remix: the recently-“released” Louis LaRouché remix)
  2. “Off The Wall” (best cover: Sébastien Léger)
  3. “Wanna Be Startin’ Something” (best sampled-by: Rihanna’s “Don’t Stop The Music”)

It’s also worth noting how sci-fi/surreal Michael Jackson was. io9 looked at Michael Jackson’s Science Fictional Life, but really all you need to do is watch some of his videos (start with “Thriller” [zombies = sci-fi!] and “Leave Me Alone”).

And finally, for some of my previous thoughts on Michael Jackson, see my “Off The Wall” post from June 2005. If you don’t want to read it, I’ll leave you with what I think is the most important thing to remember when remembering Michael Jackson:

… Michael Jackson is a sexually ambiguous and racial ambiguous person. Of course he is going to be a target of criticism. If you ask someone what type of a person Michael Jackson is, 11 out of 10 people will say, “He’s a freak.” Of course he’s going to be a victim (yes, sorry for using this word) of accusations of the worst kind — he is an easy target. Since he blurs the boundaries of gender and race, which we tend to assume are static definitions, he makes people uncomfortable and therefore we need to continue kicking him down. …

Why I Didn’t Like Slumdog Millionaire

Jamal on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire in Slumdog Millionaire
Last night I finally got around to watching Slumdog Millionaire — the best movie of 2008 Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. I was pretty disappointed with the movie (though not for the reasons I expected) and perplexed as to why so many people thought it was such a great film (maybe commenters here can help shed some light on it’s greatness?).

First, some history of me and the film: I absolutely love the director: Danny Boyle. I love Trainspotting, I was one of the few who liked The Beach, I was one of the few who went back and watched Shallow Grave, I liked 28 Days Later, and I absolutely loved Sunshine. When I first heard that he was behind Slumdog Millionaire, I was totally interested in seeing it. Before it opened widely, it was playing at the Harvard Exit theatre — one of my favorite small theatres playing independent/”art house” films.

Then the movie started getting all sorts of Oscar buzz and everyone and their mother felt the need to see it and I became a bit disinterested. (Which happens often — once everyone loves something it loses its appeal to me…) And then at the 2008 Academy Awards Slumdog Millionaire cleaned up and left The Dark Knight behind — and I very strongly feel that The Dark Knight was the best movie of 2008 and I’m still overly bitter about the fact that it didn’t even get nominated for Best Picture…

So finally last night I saw the film. Based on the fact it won an Oscar and word-of-mouth reviews I’ve heard from people, I was expecting some overly romantic sentimental movie. Everyone called it the “feel good movie of the year” so I was expecting non-stop feel-goodness — and I know I’d hate that.

But in ultimately, it was really only a “feel good movie” for the final 10-15 minutes of the film. Mostly it was a very artistically-shot flashback-heavy movie with a great soundtrack. But that describes a lot of the movies I see every year… so, again, I’m not sure what made Slumdog Millionaire so exceptional.

My thoughts on some specific aspects of the film:

Soundtrack: Danny Boyle has always been a master of creating a great soundtrack for his films:

Likewise, like everyone else, I loved the “boys on a train” scene with M.I.A.’s “Paper Planes” in Slumdog Millionaire. And the rest of the soundtrack — I don’t know if it’s “traditional Bollywood”-like music or what — really added to the “authentic” feel of the movie.

The Love Story: I expected the film to completely center around the love story. People described the film as “they [Jamal and Latika] keep trying to find each other but never connect.” Actually, they did keep connecting but then they’d split up for whatever reason (usually related to Jamal’s brother Salim). And yeah, at the end when they did the “feel good” reunion and dance it did feel like they made some love connection, but I didn’t feel the big pay-off that I expected.

But the more interesting question for me is: Why were they so into each other? As kids, I cannot imagine that they had a terribly romantic connection when they first met — if anything, I would expect them to have a brother/sister relationship. The fleeting moments they had together hardly gave them enough time to fall in love in any meaningful way. I know it’s a movie and all, but for “The Best Movie of 2008” I expected a more nuanced approach to love.

The Cinematography: Yeah it was artsy and cool, but the whole look-and-feel of the film reminded me of early Wong-Kar Wai films (e.g. Chungking Express, Fallen Angels, and Days of Being Wild). It was cool and all in Slumdog Millionaire but I have a feeling that a lot of people saw “cool camera techniques” for the first time and thought it was innovative? Or maybe it just worked really well for this movie? Anyway I didn’t think it was anything special but I feel like it’s part of what made the movie such a success?

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?: Incidentally, I’m reading The Mirror Effect: How Celebrity Narcissism Is Seducing America by Dr. Drew so the fact that Jamal wanted to be a celebrity by being on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? so that Latika would see him struck me as very real.

Conclusion: In the end, I expected to hate Slumdog Millionaire because I thought it was going to be an overly dramatic love story with a little bit of rags-to-riches thrown in for extra sentimentality. In the end, what I felt I got was a decent movie that wasn’t terribly groundbreaking or extra great in any way. If I were to be able to vote for the Best Picture film and The Dark Knight wasn’t an option, I probably would’ve gone with The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (for the huge scope and special effects and whatnot) for Best Picture. (But really I still think The Dark Knight should’ve won…)

So where am I wrong? What did I miss?

Blast FLU The Past

With all of the recent media hype about the swine flu, I’m reminded of a post I did wayyyy back in 2005: “How To Stop The Avian Flu.”

Basically, my argument is:

So if leaders around the world were truly concerned about a global outbreak and honestly wanted to do everything in their power to prevent it, perhaps they would suggest that we instate a moratorium on eating poultry until scientists have a chance to get a better understanding of the virus and/or the avian flu epidemic among the birds subsides.

People always like to blame sex for mass diseases and epidemics (e.g. syphilis and AIDS), but in the past 4 years we’ve been warned of flu pandemics and both have been related to the meat industry. AIDS rates have, for the most part, declined since the 1980s due to people altering their sexual activities.

But, again, I haven’t heard anyone talk about giving up meat or changing their behaviors. The blame here is on the meat industry that people so happily support during non-flu times.

And, again, I predict that as there are more people on this planet and more people eating more meat (especially in cultures which previously didn’t eat as much meat but have been influenced by American/European eating habits), these meat industry-caused various strain of flu “epidemics” are only going to be more common and probably more serious.

Let’s stop eating meat, people!

Considering the Universe

I’m watch an episode of The Universe about parallel universes and it’s got me doing some thinking…

First, the thing I find most fascinating and difficult to work out in my head is the idea that for everything that happens there is another universe in which something else happened. For example, according to this idea, there is another parallel universe where I didn’t write this post and you didn’t read it. In fact, there is yet another universe where you never read this blog ever and I never learned how to read or write.

I’ve been annoyed with this idea since it basically just says, eh, everything happens. But then I started thinking and I realized that there could actually be a measurable amount of universes if this is true. To figure this, however, we need to assume that the universe is finite. To be honest, I think I sort of do. Or at least for this thought experiment, I am going to consider a finite universe.

Okay, so let’s say that in this finite universe there are 100 atoms and the universe, being finite, will “die” or run out of energy or whatever after 10 years. So that means that for every instance of time during the 10 years of that universe, all 100 atoms can do only however many options an atom has. So let’s say that each of those atoms only has four choices: it can move up, down, left, or right. Over the course of 10 years there will be a universe for each and every option that an atom can do at each time slice. One of those universes may have the atoms moving over a course of time to create a star while another of those universes may have the atoms moving over a course of time to do nothing but just move around and not even interact.

So in the end you can do some really long permutation equation and come up with a number of possibilities. Even for my “small” universe of 100 atoms with 4 possible actions lasting 10 years the number of universes will be huge — but it would be quantitative. Apply that on a much larger and more complicated scale, and you’ve got our universe.

Let’s say, however, that you believe that the universe is infinite. Do you realize that if you believe this and based on probability, again, that somewhere in this huge universe there is another Earth? If the universe is infinite than why wouldn’t there be another place in the universe where nearly the exact same things happened that created what we know as Earth and now? That’s how big infinite is!!

My favorite parallel universe-related thing to think about, however, is what I just learned is called a level 4 parallel universe (aka the ultimate ensemble).

The idea of a level 4 universe actually plays into an idea I posted a couple of years ago: that the final step of evolution is creating a new reality. As I understand it, the level 4 parallel universe theory says that if you consider the universe to be a mathematical equation of sorts (which I think most people do), then that means that there are other universes that exist where the “laws of mathematics” are different.

The example I like to use is pi — a mathematical constant. In our universe the notion of pi equals a numerical value we understand as roughly 3.14. But where did this come from and why is this constant what it is?

Consider back in the days when I used to do some computer programing. Let’s pretend I’m writing a really simple computer game. At the top of the game I might define some constants. For example:

#define CHANCES 4
#define NAME "Jason"

These are constants for the entire program. Even if I tried to make a variable called “NAME” and give it another value, it wouldn’t be possible since at the top of the program I defined the name.

So let’s extend that idea into the universe. In our universe, let’s say there is something like this “coded” somewhere:

#define PI 3.14159 26535 89793 23846 26433 83279 50288
#define zero 0
#define one 1
#define NAPIER 2.71828 18284 59045 23536 02874 71352 66249

That means that in another universe, the “code” might read:

#define PI 3.12159 26535 89793 23846 26433 83279 50288
#define zero 0
#define one 1
#define NAPIER 2.71828 18284 59045 23536 02874 71352 66249

If pi was off by just that might I can imagine that the universe would be a very different place. Maybe planets wouldn’t form the way they do, etc. In fact, I bet we could figure this out if we wrote a super complicated computer program to see what happens. This goes back to my earlier idea about the next step of evolution being an intelligent species writing a computer program or tweaking the with mathematical formula that explains the universe in some sort of simulated reality.

I admit, I’m not much (or at all!) of a physicist or mathematician, but somehow this makes sense to me in an abstract way. I’ll also admit that there probably isn’t much value in even thinking about these things since I don’t think anyone has devised or even theorized on a good way to prove any of this — and if we did prove it, what would the point be? What is the ultimate implication of knowing/thinking that the universe works this way? I’m not sure… but if nothing else it’s fun and gives your brain a nice exercise!

Edit a few minutes after first posting: Now that I think about it a bit more, I think there actually are very important reasons to think about these things:

First, it shows that even crazy-unproven-and-out-there science is just as interesting and exciting as “religion” with god and stuff. It also begs the question that if the universe/multiverse/etc. is really set up this way, then there is no way “god” or anything like that could keep track of everything. Another reason to give up on a simplistic religion-based understanding of live.

Second, if we ever hope to investigate time travel or teleportation, understanding how multiverses work will be crucial. For example, it might be easy to teleport oneself into a parallel universe but impossible to teleport within one’s own universe. So is there a threshold of “acceptable differences” between universe A and universe B — that is, if the universe I teleport into is only different in the fact that 1,000 years ago a leaf fell 2 centimeters different than my original universe and scientists or whoever can conclude that this action shouldn’t cause any noticable difference, is teleportation from universe A to universe B acceptable? (Think of the TV show Sliders.) Likewise, if time traveling within one’s own universe is impossible, is traveling to a different universe with minimal differences OK?

So there you go: reasons this matters!