The thing that he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know at the time was really the one thing that he needed to know his whole life. But at that time, he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know it, so it didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter. The thing became what he was looking for, whether he knew it or not, and it was at that moment, again, though he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t realize it, that the yearning for the thing developed.<\/p>\n
He doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t remember the moment very well. In fact, he doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t remember it at all \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the memory is more of a transference from his mother and father than something his own brain recorded. In the end, the specifics of the memory didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter because its most important legacy was the spark that ignited his desire \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the desire that ultimately drove his whole life, or so he claimed.<\/p>\n
In the beginning \u00e2\u20ac\u201c in his beginning \u00e2\u20ac\u201c was love.<\/p>\n
His mother was watching from across the street. He was one-and-a-half years old. He was holding hands with his father. It was fall and there were some big oak leaves on the sidewalk that held his gaze. He pointed to one of the leaves and his dad bent over to pick it up, letting go of his hand. He waddled away from his father and looked across the street at his mother. She smiled and waved at him. He bent down and picked up a leaf of his own, held it up, and looked over at his mother with an enormous grin on his face. He laughed and then his dad came from behind him and lifted him onto his shoulders. His gaze was locked with his mother\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s and he held his arms up. He laughed some more.<\/p>\n
Once the street was clear his mother walked over and his dad squatted down so she could grab her son from his arms. He kissed his mom on her cheek and continued giggling. His dad grabbed another leaf from the ground and handed it to him. He held it in front of his face and looked into his mom\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s eyes.<\/p>\n
His mom was born in McMinnville, Oregon to Mary and Mort Christianson, both of whom were Midwest transplants. It wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t until sixth grade when he was given an assignment to write his genealogy that he really know much about his family background. Neither his mother nor father were close to their parents, and all of his other relatives were spread across the country.<\/p>\n
Mary Maseo grew up in Madison, Wisconsin. Her father studied Asian history and had met her mother on a trip he took to Japan in order to collect Ukiyo-E artwork from the Edo period. Specifically, he was looking for a particular print by Kitao Shigemasa, instead he found Akemi. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She was my light and beauty,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he told Mary many times. He convinced her to return to Madison with him where she could assist him with research. Late nights translating traditional texts and tracing themes through the prints lead to love and they were married in 1935. Mary was born less than a year later, in the fall of 1936 and her sister Susan was born in 1939.<\/p>\n
Despite the liberal tendencies of Madison, Mary and her family faced problems due to their mixed heritage, and her father ultimately gave up his position at Madison so they could move farther into the country and become more isolated. With World War Two gaining momentum and hostility among all groups of Americans growing, Mr. Maseo was convinced that rural Wisconsin would be the safest place to live. When Japanese internment began plaguing the west coast a few years later, authorities didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know to look in rural Wisconsin for Mary and her family, despite the fact their small farm was only 150 miles or so from Milwaukee.<\/p>\n
After the war Mary\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s family relocated again, this time to Chicago where Mary and Susan began attending a private Catholic school. Both of the girls excelled in their studies \u00e2\u20ac\u201c Mary, it turned out, was a masterful poet, and Susan had an uncanny ability to play the viola and understand the sciences, which were still mostly off-limits to young girls, especially young girls at a Catholic school. The nuns made an exception for Susan, explaining that because she \u00e2\u20ac\u0153had an Oriental mind\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she shouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be expected to adhere to the same rules. The nuns, in fact, seemed to be disappointed in Mary\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s more traditional interest in language and Biblical studies.<\/p>\n
When Mary graduated from the Catholic school in 1954 she had hoped to pursue her interest in writing by attending an arts school in New York. During her senior year she attended a night class for writers, where one of the young women in the class had given her a copy of a magazine called Mademoiselle that included a poem called \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mad Girl\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Love Song\u00e2\u20ac\u009d by a woman named Sylvia Plath.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153After Johnny Kartoolee took me home after a party when I was a sophomore, I found this poem the next day when I stopped at the drug store to get a pack of smokes,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the woman told Mary. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I read it and thought, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcThis is exactly how I feel. This is exactly how he made me feel.\u00e2\u20ac\u2122\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The woman explained to Mary that she had developed a crush on Johnny Kartoolee when they had American History together and she always imagined him making love to her, but that when it really happened it wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t what she expected \u00e2\u20ac\u201c not necessarily in a good or bad way, just not what she expected. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know who this woman who wrote it is, but it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s amazing. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the only thing that has captured what I feel. I wish I could write like her.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Mary bragged about that moment her entire life \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the fact that she was one of those rare and lucky individuals who read Plath during her early days and loved the poem Plath herself called one of her favorite villanelles and helped propel her into the magazine experience that inspired her to write The Bell Jar.<\/p>\n
Despite her enthusiasm about writing, however, and her ambitions to move to New York and follow Plath\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s success as a young poet, Mary\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mother wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hear of her daughter moving across the country and insisted that she start thinking about more serious matters such as raising a family. Mary and Akemi\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s fights grew in intensity, and finally in January of 1955 Mary collected the $350 she had saved from graduation and odd-jobs she had during the previous six months and left Chicago and her family without warning. She boarded a train, hoping the experience would change her life and provide her with stories she could later turn into extravagant poems. Instead, she ended up in a small town in Kansas.<\/p>\n
The day she met Mort she was feeling depressed and lonely. The train had stopped to give people time to eat and breathe fresh air and somehow Mary strayed too far from the train and missed its departure. The people at the station assured her that she could catch another train when it ran through the town the next day. One of the old women even offered to let Mary stay with her. Instead, though, Mary decided to make the best of the situation and went to a small diner where she planned to spend the afternoon writing.<\/p>\n
The diner she chose was located on the main drag and had a wooden porch in the front where all the regulars sat as they discussed the town gossip, sipped hot cocoa, and did crossword puzzles. There was a small wood-burning stove on the end of the porch which made the temperature hospitable, even during the cold, dry winters. The patrons still had to be bundled up in jackets and scarves, but apparently sitting on the porch made it worth doing. Mary was slightly intimidated by the faces, which obviously recognized her only has an outsider, but, again, she tried to make the best of the situation and strutted into the diner, ignoring the gawks and glares, and sat down on the red, vinyl-covered stool at the U-shaped counter. The walls of the diner were painted white, though dust and grime had faded the brightness into a dull yellowish, grayish white color. The floor was titled in a black and white checkered pattern. The wooden booth had the same red vinyl covering as the stool.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What can I get you sweetie?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the round-faced, ruddy-cheeked waitress asked. She had slightly-graying blonde hair. Mary wondered why she pulled her hair back in a pony-tail even though the style, Mary thought, was really juvenile and left her graying roots fully exposed.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153How about a cup of coffee?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Mary asked shyly.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153How do you take it?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the waitress asked briskly as she scribbled something on her note pad. She seemed to be intentionally avoiding eye contact with Mary.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Lots of sugar. Maybe a little milk on the side?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The waitress quickly spun around after she finished writing Mary\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s order on the pad. Most of Mary\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s luggage was on the train that she missed, so all she had with her was the duffel bag that she kept some sanitary pads, two notebooks, an extra sweater, and a pair of slippers in. She fumbled through the bag to take out her notebook and set it on the counter.<\/p>\n
The waitress returned with a cup of coffee on a teal-colored saucer within a matter of seconds. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Do you want anything else, dear?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she asked. Mary was annoyed that the waitress felt the need to feign kindness.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I asked for lots of sugar and milk,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Mary reminded her.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, I couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hear you,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the waitress lied. She reached under the counter and produced a small tin of sugar and set it beside the cup and saucer. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Let me get some milk.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She walked back into the kitchen and returned with a small cup. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Here you go, dear. Anything else?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Mary smiled and shook her head. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153This is all I need now. Maybe some food later,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she paused, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll let you know.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The waitress nodded and walked over to a table where some customers had just sat down. Mary slowly scooped the sugar into the cup and gently poured a few drops of milk. The nuns had never let her drink coffee and her parents only drank tea. This was her first time drinking coffee. She ordered it \u00e2\u20ac\u201c with lots of sugar and a little milk \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the same way Mrs. Powalski, one of the woman who worked at the art museum where her father ended up working in Chicago, had ordered her coffee whenever Mary\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s family would have dinner at the Powalski\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s. Mary had always been impressed with Mrs. Powalski\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s poise and secretly imagined that Mrs. Powalski, who had no children and who\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s husband Henry had been killed during World War II, was a novelist or poet or lead some sort of hidden life. Mary pretended that drinking coffee just like Mrs. Powalski would give her the same allure and mysterious air.<\/p>\n
After struggling through her first bitter cup of coffee, Mary decided that next time she needed to add more milk and maybe even more sugar \u00e2\u20ac\u201c six or seven small scoops, she determined, would be enough sugar to hide the bitterness. Or maybe, she even thought, the coffee at this diner just wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t good. She remembered Mrs. Powalski complaining once about cheap coffee and that only gourmet coffee was worth putting into your body. Feigning energy and inspiration from the coffee, Mary opened her notebook. She stared at the blank page. She didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know what to write. She flipped back to the previous page to see what she had previously written in hope that it would inspire her.<\/p>\n
\nYesterday we passed over the Missouri-Kansas border. The conductor said we would be in Marion County tonight. He said the train would go by Marion Lake. I wonder if they will be different from the lakes they had in Missouri. I remember when I was a kid and we went to see Lake Michigan. That was a real lake.<\/p>\n
Sometimes I miss Susan. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t miss mom and dad very much, considering they drove me away from home pretty much. I wonder if they are going to let Susan go to university or whether she will have to get married too. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s such a waste of a great mind. I hope neither of us ever get married. Once I publish my first poem I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll tell Susan to move in with me and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll let her go to university.<\/p>\n
Sometimes I wonder where I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll end up. I guess most people would say it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s stupid to jump on a train and go across the country, but somehow I just know everything will turn out okay. Maybe I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll end up in California or somewhere like that. I know mom and dad visited San Francisco when they came back from Japan and really liked it. Mom told me the weather was beautiful. Once I think she said that her brother lived there, so maybe I could live with him. But I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t remember what ever happened to him or what his last name is, so I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know how I would find him.<\/p>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m getting tired now so I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m going to try to sleep. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s hard because the man across the aisle from me snores really loud. And he has a hairy nose and hair ears, and the thought of him snoring grosses me out. He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s got grey hair and I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s shaved since he left.<\/p>\n
Tomorrow I will write a poem, I think.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Mary sighed. The next day was when she missed the train and got stranded.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s that writing you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve got there?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d a voice from behind her asked. It was a man\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s voice. But not too gruff or too deep or too commanding. He seemed soft-spoken \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the same way her dad talked. He spoke slowly, despite the fact his language wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t very fluid. The diction and the content didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t seem to match. It was the kind of voice that did not use contractions nor did it utter things like \u00e2\u20ac\u0153you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve got there\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or even \u00e2\u20ac\u0153you have got there.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She was confused by the inconsistency between the voice and the language. She couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t help but turn around to see who was talking to her.<\/p>\n
Immediately their eyes locked. Her brown eyes and his green eyes peered into each other. He was definitely attractive, Mary thought; his face was clean-shaven, his hair was cut short. Her eyes glanced down his face to his mouth, which had turned into a smile to match his warm, comforting eyes. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So, uh, what is that writing you have?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he asked again.<\/p>\n
Mary felt herself blushing. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just my dairy or something like that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He nodded. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I want to be a writer,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she said, followed quickly by, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I see.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He paused. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t from here.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure if it was a statement or a question. He slowly walked to the stool next to hers and sat down, equally slowly spinning so that they were face-to-face. He continued to smile \u00e2\u20ac\u201c like a high school boy in love, she thought. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine his life\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s story \u00e2\u20ac\u201c an exercise writers supposedly did all the time, she once read in an issue of Harper\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s. She drew a blank, and when she opened her eyes everything felt fresh and new. She blinked a few times to return to her previous thoughts and answered his statement\/question.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No. No, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not from here.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She looked down at her hands, which nervously twitched in her lap. She picked at a cuticle on her ring finger as she proceeded to talk to him. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m taking a trip across the country.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She blushed again. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153For inspiration, for, for my writing,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she stuttered. She realized that going to an all-girls Catholic school had left her extremely inadequately trained to interact with those strange beasts known as young men who lived in the real world. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she stuttered again, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What do you do?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, well, I guess you see right now I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m just over there working over at my uncle\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s butcher shop, but that ain\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t what I wanna be doing for all of my whole life.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Again, she was astonished by the softness of his voice compared to the harshness of his speech. It was like white-capped waves disturbing a serene, wooded lake, she said to herself, also making a mental note to jot that down in her journal after he left.<\/p>\n
She nodded. He glanced over at her notebook. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So what is that you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re writing about?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Like I said before, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just my diary.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He took a deep breath. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So anything interesting has happened to you on your travels?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
She laughed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I got stuck in this town.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She laughed again. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So far this has been the most interesting thing to happen.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She paused, thinking of how she wanted to word her next statement. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Trains, you see, are not as romantic and exciting as they are made out to be. Maybe in Europe when you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going over mountains and through small towns, but there isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t much to see between Chicago and Kansas.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re from Chicago?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, but I was born in Wisconsin.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153My cousin Charley moved to Chicago a few years ago. He wanted to work at a meat processing plant,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he explained, excited about the connection he thought they were making.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, there is a lot of meat packing in Chicago.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m Mort,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he awkwardly interjected.<\/p>\n
She stopped picking at her fingers and unfolded her hands. She lifted her right hand and lightly extended it to shake Mort\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s hand. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m Mary. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s nice to meet you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d And she meant it.<\/p>\n
Mary, II<\/h3>\n
After talking about nothing for fifteen minutes or so, Mort suggested that the two move to a booth because it would allow them more privacy and because the seats were more comfortable.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t believe you just got on a train and left everything.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Mary explained slowly, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t leave everything behind.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She laughed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Though, I guess, most of my stuff left me behind when that train took off.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yah, wow, that ain\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t cool at all.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Mort was sipping a Coca-Cola from the fountain machine as they talked. Mary was making another attempt at drinking coffee, this time with more sugar and more milk. As they sat across from each other, drinking their respective drinks and sharing their respective life stories, both of them felt compelled to continue digging into each other\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s past.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 so what happened after he hit the homerun? I mean, was that the end of the game?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Mort blushed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, actually, no.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He took a sip of his Coca-Cola before continuing, then sat up more straight and held his hands out, as if to demonstrate. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You see, I was up next to bat, and even though I knew we had the game in the sack, I still wanted to impress my folks.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He placed both hands on the table in a perpendicular arrangement and pointed his forefinger on his right hand toward Mary and the other hand in a fist in the middle of the table. Although she wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t completely sure, Mary assumed he was somehow trying to depict the a pitcher (the fist) and himself (the pointed finger). \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So when the pitcher threw the ball,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he tilted the fist, as if throwing something, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153BAM! I cracked that ball straight down the third-base line and ran all the way to second base.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He snapped his fingers as if to capture the sound of the leather ball hitting the wooden bat.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Then what happened?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Mort relaxed his posture and slouched back into the booth. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153The next guy up to bat, Chris McIntosh, struck out.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So you didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get to make it to home base?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
He sighed again. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, I would\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve if it weren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t for Chris McIntosh.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
For the first time since they met in the afternoon there was an awkward silence. Mary looked into the coffee cup to study the rings of residue at the bottom. Mort twirled the straw in his soda, pushing the ice cubes around the bottom of the glass.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So can I ask you something, Mary,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Mort finally said a minute or so later, breaking the silence.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sure.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What if I came with you\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 like\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 came with you on the train?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Years later, when retelling the story to her children, Mary always emphasized the fact that \u00e2\u20ac\u0153those were different times\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153it was a small town, not a big city.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d When asked if she would do it again, she always refused to answer.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, umm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 well Mort, I\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d <\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dYou don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know me. I know,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he conceded. <\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the truth though, Mort, so I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure what to say,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Mary was trying to be both rational and sincere with her answers.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Look, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m a nice guy. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve lived in the town my whole life. Your life sounds interesting.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He paused to consider his next words carefully. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153My life here ain\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t going nowhere\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 and your life\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 it sounds like you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going somewhere\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 and I want to go somewhere too.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
That night Mary stayed at the woman from the train station\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s house and Mort spent most of the night packing his things. The next morning they met at the same diner, had a breakfast of pancakes, hash browns, eggs, and coffee and left on the train at 10:50 a.m.<\/p>\n
By the time the train arrived in Portland, Oregon Mary and Mort had fallen in love and decided to elope. Eleven months later, in February, 1955, their first child, Doreen, was born.<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mom, Grandma never told me that she ran away from home.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Doreen said, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She kept a lot of things secret, I guess.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Prologue<\/h3>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m afraid that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just not going to cut it.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He gritted his teeth as he held the cell phone between his ear and shoulder and tried to secure the rope to the steel ring on the side of the box. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153We needed this thing shipped out yesterday.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He continued fumbling with the ring and rope, finally getting the rope secured through the loop in a square knot. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Look, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t care what he says anymore. This is out of his court. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s our responsibility now.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The rain was pouring down and there were intermittent flashes of lightning and clashes of thunder. The whole situation reminded him of the time during the last war when the he was stationed on engaged in combat with a Saudi ship. The encounter was particularly bloody and the first major military battle fought on the sea during that war. Years later when things heated up in China, naval warfare in the South Pacific became more prevalent, but nothing was bad as that first meeting with the Saudis.<\/p>\n
Constant downpour and the rocking of the small fishing boat caused him to lost his balance a little, causing his cell phone to drop and slide around on the main deck. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Goddamnit,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he yelled into the cold, damp, empty air. Nobody else was with him on the boat, but he felt the need vent his anger into the open anyway.<\/p>\n
Once all the rings on each corner of the crate had the ropes secured to them, he went to the main deck to recover the cell phone. He dialed back to headquarters, wishing for a second that the cell phones they used back in 2008, last time he was in the middle of the ocean, worked as well as they do now.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the voice on the other end answered.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I dropped the phone. Did you make any progress?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sorry bro, no luck yet. He insists that it isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t a problem anymore.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153But we both know it is,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he paused, taking a second to question the loyalty of his friend. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I mean, you do believe in this, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Of course man, you know I do. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been with you on this whole thing all along, remember?<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, yeah.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He was only a slightly more reassured. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Then I guess we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll take things into our own hands again. We can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t let them fuck it up this time.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay. If you think that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s best\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I mean, without the support of Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dLook, Matt Matson is a fuckin\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 lunatic anyway. If he had his way all along things would be a million times worse, remember?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I know, but he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dAt this point, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t care who he is or who they say he is or who he says he is. If all that shit\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s true, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d be in the mess right now anyway. Maybe he wants things to get worse.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t believe he was justifying his actions and beliefs again. He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d been over these arguments with the group so many times it he felt like a record spinning round and round.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve gotta take care of my shit here. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll give you guys a call in a few hours to let you know that everything went okay, cool?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Thanks Jordan \u00e2\u20ac\u201c we knew you could handle this.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Birth<\/h3>\n
Doreen gave birth to her son Matt in March of 1981. When Matt was born her husband and Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father, Jon, was away on a business trip to Miami, Florida.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Jon, isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t there any way you can fly back on an early flight or something? Doreen really needs you,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d his sister, Melissa, scolded him two days before Doreen had Matthew. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s going to be any day now. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you want to be there for your son\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s birth?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You know I do, but I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve got a meeting with the MacMallory Company tomorrow and if I land this account\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dWork, work, work. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s all it is with you sometimes, isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t it?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt was born at 11:21 p.m. Jon arrived at the hospital three hours later. He landed the account and planned to surprise Doreen, hopefully before she had the baby. His flight was supposed to leave Florida at 6 p.m., which meant the nonstop flight would land him in Seattle sometime around 9:30 p.m. (which was a six-and-a-half hour flight). Unfortunately, the plane was delayed, so Jon couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make it exactly when he wanted.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry Mr. Matson, but there isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t anything we can do. The FAA requires that we fully inspect the plane when there are any concerns about the plane\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s integrity. Since a mechanic noticed some small cracks in one of the wings before loading, we have no choice \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and really it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the best choice we can make \u00e2\u20ac\u201c do ensure the safety of the aircraft before departure. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure you understand, Mr. Matson.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Jon grumbled and returned to the waiting area. He had already finished reading the latest Mike Rosemann mystery\/thriller novel, and was growing extremely anxious waiting. He considered calling Doreen or Melissa on his cell phone, but he genuinely thought that surprising them would make him look like Super Dad or something. He had no idea that Matt would come so soon, despite Melissa\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s desperate attempts to get him to return early.<\/p>\n
When Matt was born he weighed five pounds, eight ounces and was twenty inches long. He had a pretty full head of jet black hair and piercing brown eyes. Doreen\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents came up from Oregon to be there for his birth. Jon\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s sister Melissa was the only other relative in attendance. All the nurses commended Doreen on her poise during the ordeal, and Melissa joked that if she ever got pregnant she would take lessons from Doreen on how to get through labor.<\/p>\n
It was a seemingly perfect birth and Doreen and Matt were released from the hospital two days later. For dinner the first night Jon cooked one of Doreen\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s favorite soups, tomato basil, and treated her like when they first met years ago.<\/p>\n
Childhood<\/h3>\n
(probably gonna add some shit in here and\/or totally rewrite this section and turn it into lots more stuff)<\/i><\/p>\n
The first two years of Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s life, which he doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even remember, were rather uneventful. Doreen stopped teaching at the University of Washington so that she could stay home and take care of him. Jon continued to overachieve at his job, providing his wife and son the comforts of life he wished he had while growing up. Matt had his own nursery, a chest full of toys and stuffed animals, and a wardrobe composed almost entirely of Baby Gap.<\/p>\n
In November of 1983 Doreen gave birth to another child, Julia. Matt was too young at the time to realize the change a younger sister would have on his life. Mostly he was excited about her because he thought she was a new toy. Doreen and Jon made an effort not to divert their attention from Matt to Julia, and in the process probably ended up spoiling Matt more than anything.<\/p>\n
Doreen found herself pregnant yet again in July 1984, but had a miscarriage.<\/p>\n
Bloody Monday<\/h3>\n
When he woke up that morning, it felt just like any other morning. His high school started at 7:30 a.m., so he usually woke up around 5:45 a.m., which gave him just enough time to shower, eat breakfast, and catch the bus so that he arrived at school around 7:20 a.m.<\/p>\n
That morning, however, Matt first woke up at 4:37 a.m. He could\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve sworn that he heard his alarm clock and that it jolted him from his dreams, but when he double-checked the alarm, it still displayed 5:45 a.m. as the time at which it would go off. Matt grumbled a bit, confused and disoriented by his unexpected wakening. His throat felt extremely dry, so he slowly got out of bed, grabbed the large plastic cup on the nightstand, and stumbled over to the door.<\/p>\n
Once he reached the hallway an intense feeling of vertigo overcame him. The walls appeared to be vibrating and he heard a loud, dull buzzing that seemed to be emanating from inside his head. To his left, the hallway led down about twenty feet to the bathroom he shared with his sister Julia. To his right, the hallway led to a flight of stairs that lead down to the dining room and kitchen. He figured the strange walls and sounds would dissipate as he became more awake, so he leaned over and used his hand to guide him along the wall as he walked toward the stairs. The sound, however, only got worse, and he became even more dizzy and disoriented. The soft, smooth feel of the wallpaper that lined the hallway morphed into something dry and coarse. He tried to focus his eyesight on the wall, but the pale, dull off-white instead appeared as a film projection showing insects crawling all over each other and birds flying over and under them.<\/p>\n
Startled by the bizarre hijacking of his senses, Matt fell to the ground and started crawling to the stairs. The floor, which was normally a short, soft cr\u00c3\u00a8me-colored carpet had turned into sticky mud, and Matt struggled to crawl through it, alternating between moments of slipping and moments of being stuck and unable to move. The mud was cold and gave Matt, who was only wearing a pair of his J. Crew boxers, a severe chill. Though just as he thought his hands were going to go completely numb, the mud heated up so that it felt like boiling oatmeal, and he instead worried that his hands were going to get burned.<\/p>\n
As he attempted to crawl the short distance to the head of the stairs, where he figured, for some reason, that all of this strangeness would end, he tried to come up with an explanation for this hallucination or whatever it was.<\/p>\n
The other day he was hanging out with a guy he met at a rave a few months ago named Jamie. Although he hadn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t done any drugs for over a month and was trying to cut back (he used to smoke weed at least four times a week and partied on ecstasy once or twice a month for about two years straight), Jamie convinced him that smoking a little pot wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be bad, so they filled up the pipe and smoked about four bowls that afternoon. Once they were high, Jamie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s friend, Kirsten, came over. Matt held a secret crush for Kirsten since he first saw her on their first day of Algebra II last fall. The weed didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really make him lethargic or sleepy, or even gave him the munchies. More so, it just made him extremely relaxed and content with the world \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and he giggled a lot. He had always smoked out with his guy friends, so he wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t quite sure how to act around this guest of the opposite gender.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh hey Kirsten, do you remember me?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he slurred.<\/p>\n
She wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t high yet, but had already packed herself a bowl and picked up the pipe. Before taking a hit: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt, right? From algebra?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
He grinned as she took her first hit, then laughed a little, surprised and happy that she actually knew who he was. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Haha, yah, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s me!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
By this point Jamie, who tended to fall asleep whenever he got stoned, was laying on the couch watching something on the television. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t mind me,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he said, though at this point both Matt and Kirsten had pretty much forgot he existed.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve always thought you were really cute,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt said to Kirsten, ignoring Jamie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s announcement. Apparently the weed made him less inhibited and more able to express his feelings.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Wow,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Kirsten responded, taking her third toke. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dI\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry, I know it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s weird for me to say. I just wanted to, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcya know?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t mind me, lovebirds,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Jamie announced again in his half-awake or extremely stoned voice.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, I like you too, I think.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She took another hit and started moving closer to Matt. She stopped once they were sitting right next to each other, shoulder-to-shoulder and seemed to freeze up.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 uh\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt muttered.<\/p>\n
She didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t respond immediately, then burst out with some sudden jolt of energy, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So Matt, do you know what shotgunning is?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Here, open your mouth,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she commanded him. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153And why don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you close your eyes too.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt reluctantly obeyed. With his eyes shut, he heard the click of her lighter and then the sound of her inhaling a big hit. Then he felt a warm, moist feeling near his mouth, and then he felt the wetness of her lips touching the sides of his lips. Started at first, he then felt his mouth filled with smoke coming from Kirsten. He fought his initial reaction to cough or push her away, and relaxed his throat, allowing him to swallow enough smoke to feel its effects. A few seconds later she moved her mouth away and he opened his eyes.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That was amazing\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he moaned.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s fun, huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Haha. Yeah, I liked it.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So now it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s your turn.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You mean you want me to\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dYeah, you do it to me.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Again, Matt followed her orders. He picked up the pipe, took a hit, held it in his throat, put his mouth over her\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s, and exhaled the smoked. As he was exhaling, she reached her arm around and placed it on the back of his head, holding their mouth-locked position. She slowly moved her tongue around her mouth so that it moved into his, and the two began kissing passionately.<\/p>\n
The whole thing moved so quickly that it felt like a hazy dream for Matt. The next thing he knew, they were on the floor with their pants down fucking awkwardly like the high schoolers they were.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t cum in me, okay?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she said as he was thrusting against her.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, I won\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he uttered.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153When you get close, just shoot on the floor or something, we can wipe it up later.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
He groaned an affirmative and kept working at her. The weed was making it hard for him to concentrate as much as he wanted to, and although it felt good for him, he was concerned that Kirsten was disappointed at his performance. She simply laid back on the floor with her legs spread, resting on her elbows so that she was propped up enough to occasionally kiss him. Sometimes she made a few whimpers and moans, but mostly she was silent. The only sounds he could hear were Jamie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s snoring and the wet, somewhat sticky sound of his cock going in and out of her.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I think\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m getting close\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he stuttered.<\/p>\n
Kirsten moved her body back a little, forcing Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s penis out of her and he stroked himself until he shot a healthy-sized load on the floor.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll have to make sure to wipe that up,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Kirsten explained matter-of-factly.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh, yeah,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt said, reaching over to grab their underwear. He handed her the pair of black silk panties she was wearing. She smiled, slipped them on, then reached over for her jeans.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So I should be getting home and stuff,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she said as she stood up. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I just told my mom that I was stopping over at Jamie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s to get some stuff for school.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh, yeah. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s cool.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure what else to say to her. He had had sex before, with two different people, even. But both of those girls were his girlfriends at the time, so it wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t casual at all. He remembered frequently being annoyed when, after having sex, the girls always wanted to lay in bed and talk or just hold each other. He felt strange being in the opposite position. He wanted to kiss Kirsten again, or say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153That was really great\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I really think you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re pretty\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or something to acknowledge what they just did.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll see you at school tomorrow?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she asked.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sure, yeah. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be there.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Once she left, Matt cleaned up the mess on the carpet, left Jamie to sleep, and walked home, dazed highness from the smoking and the sex.<\/p>\n
That night Matt had trouble getting to sleep. He felt extremely anxious and paranoid. Normally when he did drugs he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t suffer any after-effects \u00e2\u20ac\u201c this time seemed to be different though. At one point, during dinner, he refused to eat his mom\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s stir-fry, convinced that there were small beetles hiding among the vegetables and noodles.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m just not hungry, I guess,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he lied. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I ate some stuff at Jamie\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s house earlier.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Once he did get to sleep, he had a dream about flying and then being naked during a class presentation \u00e2\u20ac\u201c both recurring themes in his dreams, but never occupying a single dream simultaneously. When he awoke the next morning he felt fine. When he saw Kirsten at school, they pretended not to know each other. He figured everything that happened that afternoon was behind him just like any other bad\/strange day from one\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s life.<\/p>\n
But as he struggled across the floor to the stairs, he couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t help but wonder if Jamie hooked up him with bad weed or his body was having some allergic reaction or something. The confusion of why this was happening to him only added to the utter confusion of the entire situation.<\/p>\n
Nonetheless, he continued climbing along the sticky\/slippery, cold\/hot floor until he reached the stairs. Something told him that once he got out of this hallway everything would be alright.<\/p>\n
Putting one hand out, then another, with his knees sliding behind him, he crawled until finally something felt different. He lifted his right hand from the ground, moved it slightly forward in mid-air, then reached ahead of him to place it back on the ground. When he thought his hand was going to stop at the floor, it kept going, and the next thing he knew he was somersaulting down the hard, wooden stairs. All he could hear was an intense ringing in his ears. All he could see was a bright, but dull, light in front of his eyes, intensifying each time his head hit one of the solid steps.<\/p>\n
It felt like he fell for five minutes, but what was really only a twenty second fall ultimately left him at the bottom of the stairs, sore and weak. He couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even move and finally drifted out of consciousness.<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
When he awoke he realized he was on a bed of some sort. He couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see clearly, but he could make out the blurry image of a person hovering over him. He winked and moaned a little to alert this person of his reemergence.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt? Matt? Are you awake now?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the voice shrieked. It was his mother.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mmmm,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he groaned.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hold on, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll get the doctor.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She quickly rushed out. The clicking noise of her boots echoed in his head.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 and I was just standing there and he opened his eyes and I heard him make a noise, so that mean\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s okay, right? I mean, he just fell. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s no big deal, right? I mean, he has school and\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he could hear his mom talking to doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s ear off as the two of them entered the room.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re awake now, huh Matt?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor asked him in a patronizing tone. He appeared to be in his mid-fifties, with a head of brown hair that was thinning and growing grey. He face appeared to have some stubble on it and sprouts of random hairs jutted from both his ears and neckline.<\/p>\n
Matt responded to the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s question by groaning an affirmative and nodding a little, until he realized that his head hurt too much to move it much. He then realized his mouth was still dry. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Water?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he begged.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, yes, I suppose you want some water, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He pointed over to the bathroom in the corner of the room and directed Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mom to fetch some water. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll get you some, kiddo, then you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be okay.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt wanted to groan \u00e2\u20ac\u201c nobody had called him \u00e2\u20ac\u0153kiddo\u00e2\u20ac\u009d except for his grandpa, on his father\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s side, and that was at least ten years ago. His mom quickly returned with a plastic cup filled with lukewarm water, which Matt quickly drank.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Miss,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor then said to Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mom, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m going to have to ask Matt here some questions. Would you mind leaving the room?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, sure, I guess.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She was somewhat taken aback. Her son had just woken up from, she didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even know what, and now the doctor was telling her to leave suddenly. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll just be sitting out in the waiting area?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be fine. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll get you when Matt and I here are finished.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
She nodded, grabbed her bag and coat from the chair next to Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s bed, and left the room. Once she left, the doctor closed the door.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So Matt, what is the last thing you remember?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, it was early\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 like I think 4:30 or something\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 and I thought my alarm went off\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d <\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dWhat time does it normally go off?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153At 5:45, usually.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And did you change your alarm setting the night before?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think I did, at least.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mmhmm,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor nodded quizzically. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Then what?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, well, I remember getting out of bed to get some water.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He paused, trying to remember what happened next.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And then?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor seemed to be impatient.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I guess I got out of bed, then went down the hall to head downstairs.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And you just fell down the stairs?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t remember falling, no. I remember feeling dizzy.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I see.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The doctor took some notes on his tablet. The sound of the pencil on the notepad sent shivers up Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s spine. The doctor wrote hard and fast, which made the scratching even more intense. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll need to get some blood drawn and take a look at that,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he concluded.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Why? What do you need my blood for?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Just so we can run some routine tests,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor explained.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I mean, do you have to though?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Why, is something wrong?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m really afraid of needles,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt lied. He wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t entirely sure why, but he was terrified of giving his blood over to have it analyzed by anonymous lab technicians. Perhaps, he thought, it was the idea of his blood containing all his secrets, all his genetic code. He remembered reading an article in his biology class about extracting a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153DNA fingerprint\u00e2\u20ac\u009d from a person\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s blood and using that \u00e2\u20ac\u0153fingerprint\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to track down serial killers. And in another class he read an article about using samples of a person\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s blood to predict whether they would have cancer or whether they had HIV or some other life-threatening condition. What if the doctors found something in him \u00e2\u20ac\u201c what if they gave him a death sentence? Wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t he rather just keep his blood to himself?<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Look, to be honest Matt,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor set down his pad and moved closer to Matt, as if to feign compassion, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m concerned about your situation. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not normal for a seventeen year-old man to suddenly collapse and fall down stairs.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He paused, realizing that he was only making the situation worse. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I mean, you could have an iron or some other vitamin deficiency, or maybe you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve just come down with a flu bug \u00e2\u20ac\u201c either way, I think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s best that we find out.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt nodded, realizing that no matter what he said, he couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t escape giving his blood. Even if he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t consent, the doctor would talk to his mom, and certainly his mother would coerce him into letting the doctor take a sample. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, okay. Just do it quickly, okay?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The doctor nodded, then headed over to a small, locked cabinet in the corner of the room. He removed a small, green plastic device and a little glass pipette.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 do you really think, though, that I should be giving blood \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I still feel a little dizzy and stuff,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt tried to argue.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be fine. All I need is a little prick. See,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he held out the green plastic device. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll just put this over your finger and press down. It will puncture the skin just enough so that I can use this,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he pointed over to the glass pipette, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153to extract just teensy bit of blood.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt solemnly nodded and extended his hand. He couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t help but watch as the doctor pricked Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s finger. The small razor going into him felt more like an intense, sharp burn. He then felt a little light headed, and let his arm and head relax back into their resting positions. The doctor was too preoccupied with getting the blood from Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s finger to enter the pipette that he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t notice that in the meantime Matt had apparently passed out again.<\/p>\n
Hospital, I<\/h3>\n
A few minutes later Matt regained consciousness and was startled by the audience that had assembled to watch him sleep, or whatever it was, in bed. The doctor, who he remembered was in the room before he fainted, was joined by his mother, father, and sister (apparently his father and Julia had been in the waiting lounge all along).<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Are you there Matt?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor asked.<\/p>\n
Matt gave his now-perfected affirmative grunt.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Good heavens! What keeps happening, Matthew?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d his mother asked, one hand slightly covering his mouth and the other grasping Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s arm.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I dunno, but I really think everything is all right mom, for real,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt answered nonchalantly.<\/p>\n
She looked over at the doctor to see whether he would agree with Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s self-diagnosis or refute it. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hmm\u00e2\u20ac\u009d was all that he gave her. He looked down at his notepad again, flipped through some pages, then started tapping the eraser of his pencil on his teeth. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m just not sure,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he finally said. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think it would be best if Matt stayed at the hospital tonight so we could monitor him. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll move him over into the general day-stay ward for the night and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll reevaluate him in the morning.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So do you think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s anything serious, doctor?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d His mother was unsure how to exactly read the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s response. At least he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have to do more tests, she thought, or spend the night in the intensive unit or anything like that. But at the same time, she told herself, the doctor wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t telling her not to worry or that Matt was just exhausted or anything like that. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I mean, what should we do?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor started, then paused for a second, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think the best thing, Mrs. Matson, is for you and your husband to go home and rest easy. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure Matt will be just fine.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
That was the reassurance she was looking for, though her husband was less skeptical. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Are you sure, doctor. I mean, I can take the day off tomorrow and spend the night here with him, if you think that would help?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mr. Matson, I assure you, Matt is in fine hands here at Sexton Memorial Hospital,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor addressed Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father in a very detached, business-like tone. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153He will receive nothing but the finest care and compassion.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh-huh,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father accidentally let out. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, well. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s that, I guess.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153If anything comes up we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll certainly call you. But if you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t mind, I think we need to run a few more tests and get Matt setup on the other ward.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The doctor watched Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mother\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s face drop. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153But we do have visiting hours later this evening, so you can stop by then.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mother nodded and the family quietly shuffled out of the room after showering him with small but affection kisses and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I love you\u00e2\u20ac\u009ds. Julia also left behind a small teddy bear with a heart sewed to its chest with the word \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u009d in it. She had bought it at a craft store the other month and was saving it for some special occasion, and figured that a trip to the hospital was special enough.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll stop by later this evening with a change of clothes, Matt. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll bring those sweatpants you like and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll have Julia get a shirt,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mom explained. Matt only responded with a smile.<\/p>\n
Once Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s family left, the doctor explained that the technicians were still running tests on Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s blood and that for now all they could do was wait. This meant that they might need to get some x-rays later, but for the time being, he would move Matt into another ward and that everything was going to be okay. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, and I think you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be sharing the room with another patient, is that okay? I think he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s your age.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
As if he had a choice.<\/p>\n
After a fairly long trip through the hospital in a wheelchair (the doctor wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure that Matt should necessary be walking so soon), Matt arrived in the mustard-colored room where he would be spending the night. The room was divided into two with a single curtain, and Matt could already hear that his roommate was watching television. Immediately after Matt and the doctor entered the room, a nurse followed with some sheets for the bed.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hi Ieisha,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor started. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153This is Matt.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The nurse smiled. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Would you mind introducing Matt to his roommate?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh sure, just let me get these sheets on first, I guess.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t seem particularly thrilled about the idea of playing matchmaker or whatever she was supposed to call it. She was a nurse. She was in this job for the medicine, not the people. But anyway\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sam,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the nurse yelled to the person behind the blue, sterile curtain. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d like to introduce you to\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she had already forgotten Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s name and looked to the doctor for her cue.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor half-whispered \u00e2\u20ac\u201c loud enough so Sam could her it, but soft enough so that he sounded like he was attempting to be sneaky.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, Matt. Sam: this is Matt. Matt: this is Sam,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the nurse quickly finished. She didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even bother to move the curtain so they could see each other face-to-face. Once the nurse finished preparing Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s bed, she gave him and the doctor a curt smile and left the room. The doctor, somewhat flustered by the nurse\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s, what he thought was, rude behavior, pulled open the curtain and forced the two to have a more formal introduction.<\/p>\n
Sam, it turned out, whose last name was \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Not,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d which the doctor found extremely funny, was in the hospital because he had his appendix out two days ago. He was originally from New Orleans, Louisiana but moved to Washington with his family when he was twelve because his dad got a position at Microsoft. He hoped to go to college somewhere on the east coast and wanted to eventually go into politics \u00e2\u20ac\u201c perhaps as a U.S. senator or representative. He was one of those people who had everything in life planned out. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It pisses me off that my appendix had to give out or whatever the weekend of my S.A.T.s. Now I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure if I can take them in time to do early admission, which basically throws off my whole plan,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam vented to the doctor, who seemed to, unlike Matt, genuinely care.<\/p>\n
Sam, I<\/h3>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153If you could just tell me your full name, I can go ahead and process the forms for you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the voice trembled. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153My name is Andrea.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And your last name, Andrea.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Not.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And how is that spelt Mrs. Not?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Miss Not. My husband left me. And it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s N-O-T. Like when something isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t, not like what you tie.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay Miss Not, and is this your first time here?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve never been here before.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And what about your son? Is it his first time as well?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, his first time as well.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She stopped to think for a second. Was this really the right thing to do? Would she regret this five, ten, twenty years down the road? Her former husband, Mr. Ronald Not would certainly object to this. So would her mother and her father and most definitely her sister. Yes, her sister, Michelle, would certainly be the most upset at her decision. But what did it all matter, really? It was her life and she had never been one to let others control her. Why should she start now? But still\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 something about the whole situation bothered her and she couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t help but second guess herself. Maybe she should turn back? \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, m\u00e2\u20ac\u2122am?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she asked reluctantly.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes Miss Not?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153If I go ahead with this, is there any, umm, is there any turning back? I mean, what if I change my mind later?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The woman chuckled. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Of course there is.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She paused for a second, realizing her laughter and reassurance probably wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t enough of an answer for Miss Not. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153This is an experimental program,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she restarted, slowly this time. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153The last thing we want is for you or your son, Sam is his name?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Miss Not nodded so the woman could continue. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, we certainly don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want you or Sam to feel uncomfortable or awkward in any way. In fact, not only would it defeat the purpose of the program, but it would also, I can only imagine, skew our results.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Thank you, that is reassuring,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Miss not answered, and finished filling out the forms. Once everything was signed and dated, she brought the clipboard over to the screener at the receptionist\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s desk.<\/p>\n
The woman smiled. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll take these back to Dr. Riese and he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be out in a few moments to get you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Miss Not nodded.<\/p>\n
Sam was at a small table in the corner of the waiting room playing with some large blocks \u00e2\u20ac\u201c building a house or something like that. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s always building and tearing down houses,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d his mother had to explain to people whenever they were out in public. He was always drawing or building or doing something creative to keep himself occupied. And nine times out of ten it involved houses. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think he misses the house we lived in before Ronald and I separated, maybe,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d was her only explanation. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I guess he has a thing for houses?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
After waiting somewhere around fifteen minutes, most of which Miss Not spent reading through the assortment of health magazines littered throughout the waiting room, Dr. Riese came out and called for \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mrs. Not and her son Samuel.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Miss. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m divorced,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she explained. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153And he prefers to go by Sam.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sorry about that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He seemed flustered by her correction. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Will you please follow me,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he paused, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Miss Not.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
She nodded. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sam, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time, honey.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He groaned a little, but knew better than to get into an argument. He quickly disassembled the castle or cabin or whatever it was that he had built and jumped up to follow his mom back into the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s office.<\/p>\n
Hospital, II<\/h3>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So yeah, I think eventually I want to go into politics maybe?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That cool.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt still had no idea about what he wanted to do with his life. In fact, the worst part about his senior year of high school so far had been everyone always asking what his plans were for after graduation. He didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have any intentions of attending college nor did he have any aspiration to join the \u00e2\u20ac\u0153real world\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or whatever they called it and get a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153real\u00e2\u20ac\u009d job. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, well, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure what I want to do, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcya know?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Sam seemed a little surprised. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You mean you aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t going to college?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Nah, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think so. I mean, it might be cool and all, but I guess right now it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just not for me, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcya know?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, that makes sense. For me, it was like, there was never any question about whether I would go to college or not.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He laughed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I think my mom has been telling me since I was six that there was no way in hell I wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t going to college.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
For the first time since the two started talking earlier in the afternoon they hit an awkward silence. Sam reached over to the television remote control by his bed and changed the channel. Matt adjusted his pillow and changed the incline on the bed slightly.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So, uh, are you more democrat or republican?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt asked, trying to both break the ice again and sound somewhat intellectual.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I would say I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m an independent,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam started as he launched into what seemed like a some sort of a campaign speech. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You see, I agree with the republicans when it comes to financial things \u00e2\u20ac\u201c like making sure the budget is balanced and not giving too much money to countries in need of foreign aid. But when it comes to social issues, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m definitely more of a democrat. Like I believe in equal rights and I support public education and that sort of stuff. I definitely don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t like Newt Gingrich, though.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s cool. My mom and dad are both democrats. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve ever voted republican ever,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt explained, trying to add something to the conversation.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153See, I hate that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Then he explained slowly and carefully, as if it were the biggest deal in the world to him, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You shouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t vote party line. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s all about the person, \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcya know? Like when I vote in the upcoming election, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m going to study each candidate and only vote for the ones I agree with \u00e2\u20ac\u201c democrat or republican.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s probably the best thing to do, I suppose.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure where else to take this conversation, considering the fact he was totally apolitical and didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really follow the news or anything.<\/p>\n
After another awkward silence, which Matt spent staring out the window across the room, pretending that he was intently watching something, and which Sam spent flipping through channels on the television, Sam took the initiative to start conversation.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So do you still have your appendix?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You know, like, your appendix. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s some organ on the right side of your body\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 they don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really know what it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s for or anything and sometimes people get them taken out\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, yah, sorry, I wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure what you meant.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt coughed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, I still have my appendix, I think.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6You don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d know if you got it out.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam laughed briefly, then coughed, then groaned in pain briefly. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I forgot that I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really laugh. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153But yah, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d remember the surgery.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, then I guess I still have mine.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mine was full of a bunch of stuff and got infected or whatever so they had to take it out,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam explained.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153That sucks dude.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah. And I guess now they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going to analyze whatever was in it \u00e2\u20ac\u02dccause it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s supposed to show if I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sick or anything.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sick with what?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know. Just like, how healthy I am.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam realized he was bullshitting Matt now, just for the fun of it. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Like they can do some molecular analysis and figure out how my blood levels are doing and whatnot. I guess they have specialists who are really good read reading appendices \u00e2\u20ac\u201c that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s plural for appendix.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh huh\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt tried to sound moderately interested.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153All the extra stuff in your body just floats to your appendix. I think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s like it stores stuff that body doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want or need.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So what do you think is in my appendix?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt asked, trying to both test Sam\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s apparent knowledge about appendices \u00e2\u20ac\u201c though Matt hadn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t taken biology since his sophomore year of high school, he had a sneaking suspicion that Sam was just making shit up \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and to change the direction of the conversation.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, what was the last thing you ate?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, probably the lasagna my mom made for dinner the other night.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And before that?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well we had some salad with the lasagna.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s good to know.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam was starting to act like he was assuming the role of an interrogator or something. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153And for lunch?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh man\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 umm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I had a grilled cheese sandwich with fries.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Anything on the fries?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh, ketchup and some mayonnaise.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And to drink?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153A bottle of Cherry Coke.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153For dinner?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I told you I had las\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, to drink. What did you drink at dinner?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, my mom always makes me drink milk.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Fat free? One percent? Two percent?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Why does that matter?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll see\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam was certainly taking this seriously, Matt thought, so he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d best answer as accurately as possible.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We always have two percent.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay. Do you remember what you had the day before?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What about breakfast?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt thought he out-smarted Sam by catching something he forgot.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Actually, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think breakfast matters,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam lied, trying to cover his mistake. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153By the time you go to bed the body manages to use all of the nutrients and recycle all of the waste that you consume at breakfast.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam was pretty impressed with the on-the-fly excuse he managed to cook up.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, well, okay then.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He paused for a second, trying to remember what he ate the day before. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, on Sunday, for lunch I had an egg salad sandwich with some chips. To drink I had a glass of apple juice \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I think it was like one of those \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcmade from less than ten percent actual apple juices\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 kind of a drink. Uh, for dinner, on Sundays my mom always makes like a pretty big meal, and we had this really good leg of lamb with a bunch of herbs and stuff on it, which she said was pretty lean and low in fat, with mashed potatoes, which she made from scratch, and some corn. And to drink\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dTo drink you had two percent milk?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Exactly.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Anything else you should tell me?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Like what?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay then, let me figure all this out.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam felt somewhat voyeuristic with this slightly intimate knowledge about Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s daily life. Although it was just the food he consumed, minus, of course, whatever he had for breakfast, which would actually prove to be pretty interesting, but he couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t risk retracting his previous \u00e2\u20ac\u0153breakfast doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter\u00e2\u20ac\u009d statement, there was something about the itemized consumption that made Sam more than a little excited. Or maybe more curious and intrigued than excited? But whatever the feeling was, it struck Sam off-guard.<\/p>\n
He looked up at the ceiling for a while and pretended to count off fingers on his hand, feigning some sort of advanced calculation or analysis inside his head. After a few minutes, he finally arrived at an answer: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, so here is what I think probably ended up in your appendix. Of course, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m hardly an expert, so I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make any promises.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He took a pause, trying to make the revelation even more dramatic for Matt, who, he worried, might not even care in the first place. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So first of all, the lamb is completely gone. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure your body used everything from that somehow or another. The mashed potatoes, on the other hand, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m guessing that maybe a quarter of however much you ate of those ended up in your appendix somehow. Maybe a little born, but I think most of that went through, or is going through, your intestines. As for the egg salad you had for lunch that day, I would guess that anywhere between one-sixth and one-fourth of that went to your appendix. And definitely the chips.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He took another pause, preparing to explain what happened to the food Matt ate the day of the night he came to the hospital. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So on Monday, I think, as a rule, pretty much forty percent of all food prepared in school cafeterias goes to your appendix. I know that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a lot, but it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just how it is. The Cherry Coke, on the other hand, I think all of that went to your appendix, where it served a special purpose. I think the interaction of the other food, particularly the egg salad, and the carbonation of the Cherry Coke somehow countered each other and the fizz and whatnot sort of ate away ate a bunch of whatever was in your appendix at the time\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Like when you leave a penny in a bottle of Coke for a long time?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt had to break in somehow.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve never heard that?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam drew a blank face so Matt continued. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, so I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know if it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s true or not, but I heard that if you leave a penny in a bottle of Coke for a few days or something that the penny will dissolve, or maybe the copper dissolves off the face of it or something, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s like, corrosive acids or something like that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, wow. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s cool. I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam was slightly annoyed that Matt tried to steal his thunder during his complex report, but at the same time, glad that it added validity to Sam\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s story.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Anyway,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam continued, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Like I said, the chemical reaction between the Cherry Coke and the egg salad had,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he looked over at Matt and smiled, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153a corrosive effect, as you call it.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt nodded. Sam kept going. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So that cleared up a bunch of stuff. But the lasagna at dinner probably made things a little worse, though it depends if your mom made it with ground beef or sausage.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
He looked over at Matt for an answer. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m pretty sure it was sausage, actually.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, so sausage is more artificial than ground beef, so I would estimate that two-thirds of that waste went into the appendix. But the salad \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think any of the salad would go in, since it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s healthy and all.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He took another pause, trying to rmember if he left anything out. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So, yah, basically that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s what\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s in your appendix.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Mmmhmmm, so basically everything I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve eaten recently except for the lamb.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt reflected for a second. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Why did you need to know about the milk?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam got excited. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153How could I forget! The milk,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he waited a second so he had time to figure out what the milk did. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153The milk, you see, because it has so much calcium and protein, that helped bind some of the other food together. So I guess any meal that you ate with milk, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s estimate that the milk reduced the amount of food going into your appendix by roughly twenty percent.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Wow, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a lot.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s so important and that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why I needed to know all the details about it.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt nodded. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I can only tell you, though, what\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s in your appendix. If you want to know what all that means and how healthy you are, I think you need to have it removed and analyzed by a specialist.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, I think one hospital visit is enough for me. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t plan on having mine out anytime soon.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt chuckled, then got more serious. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153So where did you learn all that stuff?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uhh, well,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam stuttered as he stalled for enough time to quip up another story. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Before I had mine out, they basically explained to me everything about appendixes.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Appendices.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, yah, whatever.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Dude, I gotta say,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt started, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153you are one hell of a bullshiter.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He laughed to himself.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh come on Sam, you think I really believed all that?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uhh\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, dude, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not mad or anything. That was genius.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The excitement in Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s voice convinced Sam that he honestly was impressed with his story, which made him a little more at ease. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Like, you should be a writer or a doctor or something.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, well, I dunno\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Hospital, III<\/h3>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So yeah, we think it could just be food poisoning, since Julia is sick and all now,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mom explained.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Wow, and you heard about the recall on the news?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt asked, relieved that there was nothing wrong with him.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, no. Mrs. Denys, who works with your father, had mentioned it to him when he called in and said he wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be at work tomorrow either. She actually recommended the butcher we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been going to for years now.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She paused, looking slightly exasperated by the source of the information. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153And he said that apparently there was some problem at the slaughterhouse \u00e2\u20ac\u201c that they didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t properly pasteurize the lamb\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s meat and it had somehow gotten contaminated with cow\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s blood and the cow had some disease that it got from eating pigs or something.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She sighed. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It all sounds very complicated and gross, if you ask me. Now I understand why my mother was a vegetarian.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And what is Julia sick with?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, shortly after we got back from the hospital she complained about her stomach and then, you know, started to throw up for a while.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What about you and dad?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, well, we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re both fine, I guess.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She contemplated for a second. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Though now that you mention it, after dinner that night your father did say that his stomach felt a little uneasy \u00e2\u20ac\u201c but I just figured it was his heartburn acting up again.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, so do you think the doctor will release me?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see why not. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s severe food poisoning, or anything like that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Cool.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Although Matt was slightly skeptical of his mom\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s explanation \u00e2\u20ac\u201c if his sister just got a stomach ache and his dad got heartburn, why did he have strange hallucinations and pass out? \u00e2\u20ac\u201c he was excited to leave the hospital, despite for fairly decent acquaintance he had made with Sam.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, I just wanted to stop by and let you know that. The woman at the desk said that your doctor won\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be back until 7 or so, so I figure we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll all come by around then.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh yay, so that means I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll still get dinner tonight,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt joked.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, when you get home we still have some left over lamb I can heat up for you,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d his mom joked back.<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
Matt drifted in and out of sleep for the rest of the evening as Sam continued alternately flipping through channels on the television and taking breaks to read some of the newspaper that his mom, who visited earlier, had left for him.<\/p>\n
Finally, the doctor came and awoke him.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt? Matt? Are you awake now?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he said after gently tapping his shoulder and shaking him slightly. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt groggily opened his eyes. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hi Matt, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s your doctor.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Huh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d It took Matt a few seconds to process everything. Finally he sat up a little more and rubbed his eyes \u00e2\u20ac\u201c they had collected an abnormal amount of gunk during the nap. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, sorry. Hi.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt? Can I talk to you?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh sure, yah. Okay.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The doctor reached around and slid the curtain in order to give them some privacy.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Are your parents coming back tonight, Matt?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The doctored seemed a little concerned, which worried Matt.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, yeah, pretty soon I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m guessing.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Disturbed by the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s tone and agitated facial expressions, Matt decided that he should explain to the doctor about the food poisoning. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Actually, though,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he started, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153my mom came this afternoon and she thinks she knows what happened\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor, obviously skeptical, asked.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, yah, see, my dad and sister had stomach aches recently, and I guess my mom heard from the butcher that she went to the other day that there was some contamination problem with the lamb we had for dinner the other night.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He paused, waiting for the doctor to react. When the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s face remained skeptically unresponsive, Matt decided to add more. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153And so I guess somehow some other blood got on the lamb, and other people are sick from it too, I think. So it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s probably just some food poisoning I guess.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hmm,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor said, tapping a pencil on his notepad, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153When did you say your parents were going to be here?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153My mom said sometime after 7. She wanted to talk to you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Okay, good. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll wait until they get here then.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He slid the curtain back to the wall. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153When they get here, if they don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t find me first, just buzz the nurse and have her get me, okay?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt nodded, extremely unsettled by the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s strange behavior.<\/p>\n
Without another word, the doctor briskly left the room.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s voice started at the other end of the room, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t help but kind of over hear that \u00e2\u20ac\u201c what\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s going on?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Umm, yeah, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure either\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s voice trailed off.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Your doctor is weird, man.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Sam laughed.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No shit.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
About fifteen minutes later, Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mother and father showed up with the doctor. Without even acknowledging Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s presence the doctor immediately went to slid the curtain, which obviously gave them no privacy since Sam could hear everything anyway. He was courteous enough, at least, to pull up chairs so Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents could sit. The doctor stood, and once Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents were seated, immediately began talking.<\/p>\n
After a few minutes of, what Matt later described as, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153a pretty lame attempt at making us all feel good even though he was obviously prepping us for bad news,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor dropped the bombshell:<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t, yet, at least, been able to identify the virus, but it does appear to have completely invaded your body\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s defenses.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s face twitched and his eyes glazed over. Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mom didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t move, either, with an equally stunned look on her face.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t ruled out whether or not it might be a strain of HIV or some other sort of a retrovirus.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt felt the blood drain from his face. He felt extremely hot and sweaty and couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t feel his hands. He felt like he wanted to vomit, but couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even animate his body enough to do that.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Or it could be an rhinovirus like the common cold \u00e2\u20ac\u201c like I said, we just aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor said, in what seemed to be some sort of an attempt at being somewhat optimistic. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve sent a culture out to U-dub and hopefully they will know something by tomorrow.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The doctor waited in silence. Matt, his mother, nor his father could say anything.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I know this is difficult news, and I truly sympathize with you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153How\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 where\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 how could he have, umm, gotten this, doctor?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father finally asked.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, well, until we know the exact nature of the virus we can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t say for sure, Mr. Matson,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor explained.<\/p>\n
Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s father slowly turned his head toward Matt. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt, have you ever\u00e2\u20ac\u201d\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u201dDad, please,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt immediately responded, knowing what his father was about to ask. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Please, not now,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he repeated, on the verge of breaking out into tears.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So actually,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor interrupted, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153We are also going to ask that we get blood samples from you, as well,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he said, looking towards Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153We aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sure how this virus is spread, so we just want to take any precautions, as I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure you understand.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
After answering some addition questions, such as \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What do we do now?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153How long does Matt have to stay at the hospital,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the doctor left the room, giving Matt and his parents some time to talk, which they used to stare blankly at each other instead. Eventually, after some crying and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I love you\u00e2\u20ac\u009ds, Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents left. Understanding the delicacy of the situation, Sam didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make any comments and let Matt spend the remainder of the evening in his solitary thoughts.<\/p>\n
The next afternoon Sam was discharged from the hospital. Him and Matt exchanged phone numbers and planned to hangout sometime, though neither of them really expected that they would. Two days later the scientists at the University of Washington determined that the virus wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t dangerous, or easily contagious (their hypothesis at the time was that only direct blood contact would spread it), and that it was highly unlikely that the virus caused Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s fainting the other day \u00e2\u20ac\u201c that it really was just a severe case of food poisoning \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and that there was no problem with letting Matt return to home and school.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Are you absolutely sure?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s doctor asked the University scientists numerous times. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I mean, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want this to turn into some epidemic or something because of us.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, we are sure. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve replicated a synthetic version of the virus and found that it really doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t survive at all outside of the body \u00e2\u20ac\u201c it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s even weaker than HIV in that sense.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153And you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re sure that the other night \u00e2\u20ac\u201c what happened to him wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t because of this virus?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re fairly confident, yes. The virus appears to have no effect on the rats which we injected the virus into. Plus, parts of the cell which this virus seems to latch on to have absolutely no correlation between the brain or blood flow, so I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see how they are related.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
The doctor ultimately held Matt and extra day, just to be sure, but when nothing happened and since Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s vitals remained consistently healthy during his stay, he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see any reason to keep Matt in the hospital. Neither Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents or his sister or the doctor tested positive for the presence of the antibodies or proteins of the virus that the scientists had isolated in Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s blood. Everything appeared to be in order and there was no apparent danger.<\/p>\n
Just as Matt was walking out the door, the doctor, who was helping him get out of bed, reached his arm out and grabbed Matt\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s shoulder roughly. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he squeezed the shoulder a little harder, causing a dull pain. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I just wanted to let you know that we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re not going to surrender to this virus, whatever it is.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Thanks, doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 I mean, do you think it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s going to be serious?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I honestly don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know Matt, but if it turns out to be a brutal killer, I promise that my army of doctors and scientists will be battling alongside me to get this thing defeated.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Matt nodded.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I mean, I want this to be clear, Matt, an unknown, invasive virus has colonized in your cells \u00e2\u20ac\u201c we don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t win until it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s destroyed.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, yes, sir, thanks for your commitment.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Matt wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t entirely sure how to respond to the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s strange remarks. Was he trying to scare Matt? Was he trying to sound heroic? Or he was just excited about the possibility of becoming famous for discovering a new virus? Either way, Matt was glad to be done with him and the hospital.<\/p>\n
Sam, II<\/h3>\n
Six weeks after the initial screening, Andrea Not received a phone call from the director of the program.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hello, is Mrs. Not available?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, this is Miss Not. Can I help you?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, sorry. Miss Not, this is Robin Samsick from the Zendra Research Group in Seattle.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, yes, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been waiting for you to call this week.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, well, good. We have good news about Sam.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes. Based on his test scores and in-person evaluations, we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve determined that he would make an excellent subject in our program.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, well, yes, that is good news, isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t it?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We certainly think so, Miss. Not.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d The man\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s voice reminded her of a radio announcer. Not like the radio announcers today, who have mostly generic, boring voices, but the radio announcers from when she was a kid \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the ones that spoke with a slight twang to their voice like Elvis. Or the ones that sounded like game show announcers \u00e2\u20ac\u201c that is what this Robin Samsick\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s voice sounded like.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153So what is the next step, Mr. Samsick.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Please, call me Robin.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, okay. Of course. So what do we do now, Robin?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m assuming that Sam is not enrolled in pre-elementary education, correct?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She felt a little guilty about this, too. She had always intended for Sam\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s life to be full of great things \u00e2\u20ac\u201c the best toys, the best education, the best parents. But she couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even find a preschool that would accept him, though she didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t necessary press the issue or follow-up as much as she probably should have. Nonetheless, Sam wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t in school, which, from the perspective of this program could turn out to be a good thing, anyway.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well good. In that case, do you think he could be ready in a week or so?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You mean ready to stay at your facility?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she hesitated as she asked the question. It was the first time the realization actually hit her that they would be separated for quite some time.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, as I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure one of our research assistants explained, the program, we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve determined, is only beneficial to Sam and our research team if we can have twenty-four\/seven access to him. So we will need him to stay in the residential area of our facilities.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, I understand.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Mr. Samsick went on to give Andrea all of the necessary details: what she should pack for Sam, when they should arrive at the facility, how often she could visit, etc. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153And how long do you think it will be until he can move back home?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re not entirely sure of that, Miss Not. It all depends on the progress of our experiment.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n
Coda<\/h3>\n
Although Matt missed a week of school, his teachers were all very understanding and gave him extensions and whatnot so he could get caught-up. <\/p>\n
Despite the fact that him and Sam had planned to keep in touch, every time Matt thought about Sam, he had to think about the whole hospital experience, which only made him feel dirty and diseased. He couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t stop visualizing the doctor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s description of the virus colonizing his body \u00e2\u20ac\u201c little bits of virus floating around in each and every cell in his body, the way viruses do. It made him cringe.<\/p>\n
The remainder of the year finished just as it would for any high school senior \u00e2\u20ac\u201c full of mostly ups and a few downs, continued attempts to separate oneself from one\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s parents and family in order to assert independence, and trying to figure out what to do with the rest of one\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s life. Ultimately, Matt decided to spend his first year after high school continuing to work full-time at the Urban Outfitters in downtown Seattle, where he had gotten a job that spring. His plan, at the time, was to work there for a year and save up money, then apply to the University of Washington and study either history or communications or both. <\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Matt, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t understand why you feel you have to take a year off to save money \u00e2\u20ac\u201c your father and I already explained that we have no problem helping you pay for college,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d his mother explained to him, in similar words, numerous times.<\/p>\n
\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yeah, I know. But I feel this is something I need to do for myself, or whatever,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he tried to tell her. For some reason he felt the need to hide the true reason he wanted to take a year off: for some reason, whether it was because he was finally nearing adulthood or what, things in his life were becoming more clear, and he thought that taking a year to give that clarity time to focus would help him direct his life.<\/p>\n
Every time they had the discussion his mother would reluctantly agree with his position, but then once a few weeks had passed, she would bring it up again. Even after all the application deadlines had passed, she still pressed. Finally, in May, a few weeks before graduation, she gave it a rest and promised to stop asking him about it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In the beginning\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 The thing that he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know at the time was really the one thing that he needed to know his whole life. But at that time, he didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know it, so it didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t matter. The thing became what he was looking for, whether he knew it or not, and it was at … Continue reading Red Eye Reduction<\/span>